Sutff Girls Like: Katherine Heigl

I don't know why, but girls love Katherine Heigl. She is a crappy actress and her criminally-awful chick flicks are, judging by Rotten Tomatoes, insufferable. Nothing in her adult/real film career except for Knocked Up has scored above 50% except for the obviously shitty 100 Girls which looks like a rip off of American Pie.

Her new movie is Life as We Know It. Just from the title I can tell it's going to be so fucking heartwarming and precious. I am also sure that this movie was created for girls and gay men by a bunch of Heigl fag hag fanboys.

I'm pretty sure the only reason she matters is because she won the loyalty of her fans in Grey's Anatomy, another thing girls love regardless of how stupid it becomes. It was her stepping stone to establish herself as the go-to face for bad romantic comedies and now we have to deal with its results.

Stuff White People Like: Kid Cudi

Last week Kid Cudi played at Assembly Hall and while there I had one of those epiphany things: white people like Kid Cudi because most of his songs have chorus parts. I'm not saying this a bad thing or a good thing, it's just a thing I realized and I found it funny when people would sing the chorus parts and then become silent.

The show was fun but Kid Cudi was only on stage for about an hour. There were basically three openers who are all good but it's kind of stupid when you spend more time watching openers than the artist whose name is on your fucking ticket.

The first opener was a Milwaukee rapper who goes by Prophetic. He was pretty good and there was one song I liked. You can find out more at www.umbrellasup.com.

Prophetic

Chip the Ripper performed and Jay Electronica after. They were both really good but Jay Electronica is a much better rapper.

Chip the Ripper

Jay Electronica

Yeah then Kid Cudi came out around 9:30 and played for only about an hour. People were pretty disillusioned an hour later when the lights came on.

"Wait, is that it?"

Unfortunately it was

Red Lion's Gonna Tell Me Where the Light Is or THE BIGGEST PARTY OF THE YEAR

Station is now gone and Red Lion rises from the sawdust. I don't know what the motivation was for changing the name of the bar. Maybe it's meant for a less brotastic crowd? Probably not because the top DMB (OMG DAAAAAAAAAVE) cover band, Trippin Billies, is playing at 4PM and I'll have you know they sound just like DMB. I want to go though because they are having Goose Island beer on special. I can put up with terrible terrible music for a little while.

College is about Priorities

If bars sold Halo 3 they could have made so much money last Monday.

Sausage fest

Counting Down the Hours

It's that time of year when I start counting down the days until unofficial. I even got this fancy counter.

Move your furniture to your balcony so you can toss that shit to the ground. It's taking up keg space anyway.

New Year Resolution Month at the ARC

The beginning of every year brings inspiration and hope to many in the form of a new year's resolution. Unfortunately, this means that gyms across the country are being flooded with annoying losers whose natural habitat is their couch. They are readily identifiable as they take up space attempting to run, swim, or lift weights. Some of them will actually honor their resolution, but we all know that the majority will become preoccupied, lazy, and then stop coming altogether.




If this sounds like you, save everyone some time and space and just quit now. You probably

A. suck at swimming,
B. are a slow runner
C. don't know how to use that machine or do that exercise you tried last time
D. have some combination of A,B,C

If anyone is offended you can try to prove me wrong. If you do then that's great, but most of you won't, so make room for the people who don't need a new year to stay in shape.

Top 20 Songs for 2009

Since I couldn't fit all my favorite albums of 2009 in a ten item list, I also made a list of top 20 songs. The playlist is ordered such that number 20 is track 1, number 19 is track 2 etc.